The Time


Now is the time…

The time for love, not strife…

The time to not grab life by the pussy but the time to grab the establishment by the balls…and fight!

Now is the time…

The time to unite, ignite, and come together…to end the blight…

The time where your race will not chain you…

The time where your sex will not define you…

The time where your disability will not confine you…

This is the time…

The time to come together as one…and to not leave the lost in the aether…

This is the time…

The time to counter hate with kindness…

The time to fight fear with care…

The time to trump adversity with hope…

This is the time…

Our time…

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Fred


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Willowisp


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The Hippo and the Goat


This is the tale of the hippo and the goat,
And while you sit there and gloat,
I will spin a tale that will grab you by the throat,
A tale filled with such terror and chills and bloat,
It will make your whole world seem afloat…
With MISERY!

Once upon a time,
In a land far away,
There was a very dark, very scary place called satiruceS,
Which was ruled by a jellyfish named ttocS,
Now jellyfish being what they are it was quite natural for ttocS to be spineless and dim.
Now ttocS had a loyal goat named eitsirhC whom he pampered and primed,
For this loyal goat was to be the master of the royal guards.
Before the goat came into power the royal guards were a loyal and happy family
Full of friendly, happy people who looked out for one another and kept the kingdom safe.
Now eitsirhC had her own loyal henchmen, Ol Smoky, a fierce if somewhat lazy fire-breathing dragon, yaR, a doddering old wizard, and The Hippo, a foul, evil being that could shoot poison out of her bowels and eat anything that wasn’t nailed down.
eitsirhC saw how well the guards got alone and how productive they were and it made her FURIOUS! “HIPPO” bellowed eitsirhC, “we must stop this well oiled, handsome team at once,
or else we will have to actually…WORK!”
Unaware of the evil plans (or stench) being laid, our brave, handsome, virile heroes continue to keep the kingdom safe. Napoleon, Casanova, Thor, and the Virgin were a tight knit group who
had overcome many obstacles,and many, many, many “bars” to protect the oil rich kingdom,
But little did they know that the Goat already had them in her beady little pig eyed sites.
“Oh JohnWayne, if only you were here with me right now,” sighed a red faced Goat, “Then we could talk about NASCAR and animal husbandry.” Done daydreaming the Goat looked at the clock and exclaimed, “it’s after 3! I’ve been here a whole 2 hours, time to go.” After instructing yaR to be as obstinate and clueless as possible she informed Ol Smoky and the Hippo to commence the plan to drive Thor and Casanova insane and then left to be with her slightly less hairy better half ffeJ.

Thus ends part one of my tale. Future installments will take place when the mood strikes me. Please ignore all spelling and grammar mistakes as some were done on purpose and the rest I don’t really care about as this story is an inside joke for myself and certain people.

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The Ballad of Gilligan


Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, 
A tale of a fateful trip 
That started from this tropic port 
Aboard this tiny ship
So this is the tale of the castways, 
They’re here for a long, long time, 
They’ll have to make the best of things, 
For Gilligan is sick of the stings,
Sick of the arrows and slings,
Thrown his way by this spiteful crew,
Day by day, hour by hour, it’s true,
Poor Giligan is beat, cursed, and abused,
It started with him, large as a whale,
The Skipper, the Skipper, mean as hell,
Little Buddy, Little Buddy, he’d yell,
Beating him soundly about the head, neck, and ears,
Little did Skipper know, on that fateful day,
The monster he awoke, with his cruel way,
For inside little buddy something snapped they say,
I AM GILLIGAN! He screamed, and he knew one thing,
They all must die, each in their own special way,
Ginger, Ginger, Ginger with your slutty ways,
You are my first, to die today,
Don’t worry my dear, I’ll make you look fine,
It’s time for your botox, I hope you don’t mind,
My Jellyfish are hungry, and ready to dine,
Laughing and dancing and skipping his way,
One down, one down, one down I say,
Look out Professor, I’m on my way,
Brilliant and handsome and possibly gay,
Will your scientific ways save you today?
Professor professor professor this way!
Quickly hurry, hurry I say,
For I have found the way, the way off this land,
Just look over the edge, isn’t it grand?
Can you calculate the force of my foot as it slams,
Into your back, for that was the plan,
Falling, falling, falling, SPLAT!
Two down, two down, two down I say,
Look out Lovie, I’m heading your way,
Blue Bloods true, pampered and prim,
Thurston and Lovie would die as a whim,
For it is quite simple to fool the greedy,
Just show them something they think they need-y ; )
Poor Thurston and Lovie, dying someplace so seedy,
Four down, four down, four down I yell,
Four awful people waiting in Hell,
Skipper, Skipper, Skipper, you mean, fat, cuss,
Today it ends for you, and your big, ugly, pus,
Drink up, drink up I say, this coconut colada,
Made my own special way! With coconut milk
And a little Curae. 
Five down, five down, five down I scream!
Mary Anne, Mary Anne, for you a special plan,
My Queen you will make, faithful and true,
And together we shall rule, for as far as the eye can see,
The parrots, natives, and apes will be our destiny,
So sit right back and relax my friends,
For now our tale is told, two happy castaways,
Here on Killigan’s Isle.

 

 

 

 

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Little Fool


Again, again, again with school,
Give up, give up, you little fool,
Toil and sweat and oft times drool,
Again, again, again with school,
Never to learn, poor little fool,
But wait! cries he, this little fool,
I will, I will, I will, complete school,
‘though lacking, in wit, knowledge, and skill,
This poor fool is moving in for the kill,
Tis not lion, wolf, nor hirsute bear I seek,
It’s a most fearful thing, for a mind so meek,
To drink in knowledge week by week,
Little fool, little fool, maybe not so weak?

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Split Asunder


When does the pain stop,
When does it end,
Sometimes I feel split asunder,
Part of my soul here,
Part with you there,
Not a minute, nary a second,
Goes by each twain,
That I’m not missing,
That I’m not yearning,
That I’m not aching,
To hold you in my arms,
Just one more time,
To see you grow,
To let you know,
In my own pitiful way,
That you were, are, always will be,
Loved, missed, cherished,
Never forgotten,
Never replaced,
My baby boy,
Caleb

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